Remember when everyone thought September would be boring? Yeah, about that…
Markets are having what we in the business call a “moment” this Tuesday morning, and honestly, the reason is kind of wild. It’s not inflation, it’s not the Fed being dramatic again, and it’s definitely not because someone tweeted something stupid at 3 AM.
Nope. A federal appeals court just decided that most of Trump’s tariffs were… wait for it… illegally imposed. Plot twist of the century, right?
The Numbers Don’t Lie (Unfortunately)
Here’s what your portfolio is probably looking like right now:
- S&P 500 futures: Down 1.05% (ouch)
- Nasdaq: Down 1.36% (double ouch)
- All the Magnificent Seven stocks: Down more than 1.5% each
Meanwhile, gold is having the time of its life, hitting new all-time highs above $3,550. Silver broke $40 for the first time since 2011. Basically, everyone’s running to the shiny stuff like it’s the last lifeboat on the Titanic.
Why This Actually Matters
Here’s the thing about markets: they hate uncertainty more than they hate bad news. And this tariff ruling? It’s uncertainty on steroids.
The tariffs are still in place for now, but companies might be able to sue for reimbursement. Imagine trying to calculate your supply chain costs when you don’t know if you’ll get a refund check from the government. It’s like planning a road trip when you’re not sure if gas stations exist.
Bond yields are spiking everywhere – not just here, but globally. The UK’s borrowing costs just hit 27-year highs. Even Bitcoin is having a rough morning, down 0.53%.
The AI Bubble Gets a Reality Check
Remember when AI stocks could do no wrong? Those days feel like ancient history now. Nvidia is still bleeding after weak guidance, and now Alibaba just launched their own AI chips, basically saying “thanks, but we’ll make our own.”
It turns out putting all your eggs in the AI basket wasn’t the genius move everyone thought it was. Who could have seen that coming? (Everyone. Everyone could have seen that coming.)
What’s Actually Working
While tech stocks are having an existential crisis, some companies are actually thriving:
- Cytokinetics jumped 32% on promising heart drug trial results
- Upbound Group is up 10% after beating earnings
- Even Ferrari got an upgrade because, apparently, luxury cars are recession-proof
The Bottom Line
We’re only on day one of September – historically the market’s least favorite month. The VIX (aka the “fear gauge”) is creeping toward 20, which usually means more volatility is coming.
But here’s the silver lining: this might actually push the Fed toward more rate cuts, which could be great news for smaller companies that have been struggling with high borrowing costs.
So buckle up. September just got interesting, and we’re probably in for a wild ride. At least the memes will be good.