Look, I get it. Investing feels like one of those things where you need a finance degree, a trust fund, and the ability to speak in acronyms. But here’s the thing: you’re overthinking it harder than a philosophy major choosing a coffee order.
A new BlackRock survey just dropped some truth bombs about why over a third of Americans don’t own stocks. The usual suspects showed up: “I don’t have enough money,” “I don’t know enough,” and “What if I lose everything and have to eat ramen forever?”
Enter Warren Buffett, the investing world’s equivalent of that wise uncle who somehow makes everything sound simple. His advice? Buy an S&P 500 index fund and chill.
“My regular recommendation has been a low-cost S&P 500 index fund,” Buffett said in his 2017 shareholder letter. Not crypto. Not the hot stock your cousin’s friend’s barber mentioned. Just boring, reliable index funds.
“But I’m broke!”
Newsflash: You can start investing with less money than you spend on your monthly streaming subscriptions. The Schwab S&P 500 Index Fund trades at around $17 a share. That’s like, three fancy coffees. You can even buy fractional shares if that’s still too rich for your blood.
The magic isn’t in the amount—it’s in starting. Think of it like going to the gym. Nobody expects you to deadlift 300 pounds on day one, but showing up consistently? That’s where the real gains happen.
“But I don’t know anything about investing!”
Here’s the beautiful part about index funds: you don’t need to. It’s like having a diversified portfolio managed by robots who never sleep, never panic, and never make emotional decisions after watching too much financial news.
Still nervous? Walk into a Schwab or Fidelity branch. They have actual humans whose job is to answer your questions without judging your financial literacy. It’s like having a GPS for your money.
“But what if I lose everything?”
Ah, the classic fear. Here’s some perspective: Yale economist William Goetzmann found that when the market crashes after big gains, there’s a 99% chance you’ll recover those losses within five years. Ninety-nine percent!
The S&P 500 has survived the Great Depression, multiple recessions, a global pandemic, and whatever that whole GameStop thing was. It’s like the financial equivalent of a Nokia phone—nearly indestructible.
Now, some fancy advisors might tell you to go global with something like the Vanguard Total World Stock ETF. They’re not wrong—diversification is good, and US stocks are pretty expensive right now. But honestly? The most important thing is just starting.
As financial planner Chris Chen puts it: “The important part for someone who is just starting is to start.” Revolutionary, right?
So stop overthinking it. Stop waiting for the “perfect” time. Stop making excuses. Warren Buffett—literally one of the richest people on the planet—is telling you the secret sauce is boring index funds. Maybe listen to the guy.
Your future self will thank you. And probably buy you a really nice coffee.